You be illin'!

...That's supposed to be a thermometer.

I decided to take a load off the other night by watching an episode of Doctor Who and drinking a steaming cup of rooibos tea.  The Doctor was being delightful as always and the tea was delicious, but I started to notice a burning sensation.

No, not that kind of burning sensation.

It was my sinuses.  For those of you who have known me for quite awhile, it shouldn't be a shock to you that I have sinus issues.  My sinuses are my weakness.  My Achilles' heel.  The Band-Aid in my soup of awesomeness.

So I knew what laid ahead of me.  Headaches.  Stuffy nose.  Light-headedness.  That awful feeling of constantly having to roll over on each side when I'm trying to sleep because everything keeps draining into one nostril.

Then of course, it turned into a full-blown cold.


Suffice to say,  I was not amused.

That's not to say I don't somewhat enjoy being sick, though.  I also saw video games, light reading and many hours of Hulu in my future, as well as what turned out to be a much needed break from my training.  I've never been one of those guys who says things like "Train through it!  You'll sweat out the toxins and the antibodies will make you stronger!" Not in my case.  Strength training with a two-day cold is a good way to make it last two weeks.

And so, in between seeing how long I can last with a six-star wanted level in Grand Theft Auto IV and reading Terry Pratchett, I started my very own sickness supplement routine.

I spent years wasting money on herbal supplements that were supposed to work, but didn't.  This could be because I didn't buy a quality brand of said supplements, because I didn't take mega doses of the stuff, or maybe they just don't do what they've been lauded to do;  I don't know.

Mayyyyybe.

Eventually I figured out a routine that works extremely well.  It actually doesn't differ much from what I take every day, but usually I'll increase my intake depending on what it is.  With this, I rarely get sick these days (I used to get sick constantly before adopting a healthy lifestyle) and in turn, less of my friends and family get a sneeze in the face.

1.  Vitamin D.

This is a big one.  Up until a couple of years ago no one gave this bad boy a second thought.  Milk was fortified with it to fight rickets back in the 1930's and it remains there, but it seemed that no one looked into its benefits for 70 years.  Now it's the biggest thing since fish oil and it might just be what the doctor ordered (HA!  See what I did there?) to build up your defenses and fight off disease.  In fact, a recent study in Copenhagen scientists found that D activates our ummune functions and without it, we won't be able to fight off bodily infections.  Yay for D.

2. Decent multi-vitamin.

Yes, there are certain things in multivitamins that just don't go well together and actually inhibit the absorption of one another, but it's still a good way to balance your diet (especially if you're dieting).  When you're sick, being malnourished is just going to make it that much harder for your body to deal with your sickness.

3.  Superfood/greens powder

If you can only take one supplement for the rest of your life, this would probably be my recommendation.  If the world of nutrition was Mt. Olympus, superfood would be Zeus, throwing lightning bolts at free radicals, estrogen and fat spandex-wearing cyclists.

Okay, maybe that last one is just wishful thinking.

Truth is, one scoop of this stuff can yield 8-12 servings of fruits and vegetables.  All you have to do is mix it in a glass of water and chug it.  Simple.  Biotest Superfood is probably the best on the market, but if you're on a budget, Amazing Grass and NSI make some decent greens powders.

4.  Zinc.

This one is fairly obvious and actually has been studied with conflicting results.  The truth is, there's no reason not to take it.  Along with it's possible immune system benefits, it's also important for maintaining normal testosterone levels and Charles Poliquin, a Canadian strength coach with many gold-medalist clients, says that all active men should be taking zinc.  Just don't take it with dairy or anything containing calcium, as it interrupts the absorption.

Plus, if you take it before you go to bed it'll make you have awesome dreams.  Think about it.

5.  Vitamin C.

Yeah, you know the deal.

6.  Cinnamon.

Yes, it's delicious, but it's also been used medicinally for thousands of years.  A 12th century German nun/herbalist named Hildegaard of Bingen recommended it as the "universal spice for sinuses"  and used it as a treatment for colds, flu, and "inner decay and slime".  How can you argue with that?

When I'm sick, I usually just dump cinnamon into my tea and stir in some raw, unprocessed honey.  It tastes as awesome as it sounds.

7.  Neti pot.

Not a supplement, but if you can get past the initial discomfort of flushing your sinuses with saltwater, it'll become one of your most prized possessions.  Try it.  Hate it.  Then love it forever.

Bonus:  Ashwagandha and Rhodiola Rosea.

I'm lumping these together because A.  They do the about the same thing and B.  I don't always have them on hand, so they're not an "official" part of my list.  These two adaptogens decrease the physical effects of stress, boosting your immune function in the process.  NSI makes a decent Ashwagandha and Biotest makes a good Rhodiola supplement.

Oh, and here's a little tidbit for ya:  Legend says that the Vikings used to consume rhodiola to keep up their strength during long campaigns.  How cool is that?

"Fetch me my rhodiola!"

Well, that's all I've got.  It works for me and it just might work for you.  Just don't come and spit in my rooibos if it doesn't.

Have any remedies of your own you'd like to share?  Comment!

Welcome to Subshack.

So through a mix of bad decisions, comfort and a general lack of determination career-wise, I've been working at Subshack for seven years.

Okay, it's not that bad.

But it still wasn't the plan.


When I was a wee-child I was pretty set on becoming an architect/boxer/movie star/Arnold Schwarzenegger's best friend.  I also had a brief dream of becoming a Holy Warrior sent from God to destroy all things evil, with awesome shiny Jesus armor and a giant Final Fantasy-style sword and probably some kind of sweet Novembeard, only it would be an ALLYEARLONGbeard because that's one of the perks of being Heaven's finest.  Then I realized at the age of eight or so that it doesn't seem that they have any sort of application process.  Also, the armor they gave me probably wouldn't be quite as cool as I originally had thought.

Not quite what I had in mind.

Fast forward about 18 years, to Veteran's Day:

It's not so bad as long as you can stay detached from it all, though.  It's pretty easy to get sucked into a bad case of tunnel vision where your co-workers become your new family (or arch-enemies.)  To have your entire day ruined because you put too much mayo in the tuna or you found out a fellow employee thinks you smell like a hooker is most likely a sign that you're not keeping your eye on the big picture.

The job can also be pretty fantastic depending on whom you're working with.  Some days it's like a festival of sandwiches, with bread cart rides, cucumber swashbuckling and cartwheel attempts (successful cartwheels:  0).  Other days I feel like I've been tied down and forced to watch an entire season of Maury, except, ya know, without as much DNA testing.

Stimulating.

Overall it isn't a horrible place to work, and it'll do until I get things figured out.  I spent years running in place, all the while making stops to look behind me.  Nowadays it's all about moving from Mediocretown to Awesomeville, which is either going to result in me becoming a huge success or a sensational dud.  Either way, it's going to be one hell of a journey.

Well, at least I'm making some progress.

You Look Fine!

Ed used to be a fat dude.

You know the type.  He was the kind of guy that would play World of Warcraft until three o'clock in the morning, throw on some slippers, get into his car, and venture to McDonald's, excited about the prospect of gorging on two or three Sausage, egg and cheese biscuits.  Mmm.

"SCHWANG!"

 "Sorry, sir.  Breakfast doesn't start until four."

"Schwong."

So what did Ed do?  He would drive around aimlessly for an hour or so, just to come back and get his biscuit fix.  It was bad.

And it didn't stop there, oh no.  Baked goods were Ed's best friend.  What better way to celebrate dinging level 40 than to prepare yourself a nice big bowl of Ben & Jerry's?  Or a bag of snack-sized Nutrageous bars?  Or a 16-inch meat-lover's pizza?

DING!  "Mmm...Coffee cake."

DING!  "Rice Krispy treats!"

DING!  "...Asparagus?  Fuck, I need to go grocery shopping."

Ed was living large.  Too large.

And so after years of not being able to run 17 feet without gasping for air, or fit into the jeans he wore in high-school, it happened.  During one of his coveted trips tot he grocery store, on his merry way to the soda aisle, Ed walked through the magazine department.  One issue stood out in particular, with a chiseled deity of a man, muscles bulging, emerging from water like Beowulf.  He was magnificent!  Thor come to life!

Ed was bitten by the fitness bug, and through trial and error, it has changed his life for the better.   Close friends, family members and acquaintances quickly noticed that Ed's physique was slowly turning from fat, blubbery noob-whale to L33T, jack3d pwn-king.  He was starting to look more like his WoW character than Chris Farley!  Sweet!

That's more like it.

Unfortunately, in a world where chubby is the new thin, you get people who just don't understand the point of training or ya know, being a non-disgusting, semi-healthy person.

It wasn't long before Ed came into contact with these toxic people, hellbent on laying their own insecurities unto him.

The office fatty:

"Come on, you look fine.  You don't need to go on some crazy diet."

The type-2 diabetic aunt:

"I don't know what you have against bread, anyway."

The paranoid, anxious girlfriend who's afraid you might leave her:

"I hate this six-meal-a-day thing.  Just put down that shake and come cuddle with me."

"Wot are ye? Some kanda health nut?"

Some of them don't even realize their own toxicity, which is a shame because it's so easy to fall into their traps.  Sure, maybe you look fine compared to the Klump family you see walking through the candy aisle at Wal-mart.  But is that really something to strive for?  And who wants to be just "fine," anyway?  "Fine" doesn't get you into the history books.  "Fine" doesn't turn heads.  "Fine" doesn't intimidate would-be foes.

"Fine" isn't, in fact, fine with Ed.

What about you?